What is the Pillars // Parents Project?
"Demographics" are at the core of many major news stories. Stories about immigration, economic growth, religion, rising prices, social security, international relations, and many other topics are heavily influenced by the number of children families are having. Historically, there was much hand-wringing in media about out-of-control population growth. But nowadays, you will find many more stories lamenting declining birth rates. We decided to investigate this issue at the local, individual level, by speaking to the people who are connected to this story in the deepest way: parents. By writing about parents in our communities — people who thanklessly undertake the essential, difficult, decades-long job of creating and raising the next generation — we can recognize them and add their stories to the public record. These "ordinary" people seldom get recognized by media!
By Emma Callicutt
From a young age, Leslie Riddle never imagined herself becoming a mother. Her dreams centered around joining the Peace Corps, traveling the world, and building a life free from the financial and emotional responsibilities of raising children. But life had different plans.
Today, Riddle is raising a family of her own while navigating the growing pressures that come with parenthood in modern America, balancing rising costs, limited time, and the emotional weight of caring for children in an increasingly expensive world. Riddle, a mother of three and a CPS worker, has overcome significant obstacles to build what friends describe as a successful and fulfilling life.
“She is the hardest-working and most loyal person I have ever met,” said Tracie Yates, Riddle’s longtime best friend. “She deserves all the happiness she’s ever received.”
Yates said she watched Riddle build her life from the ground up while balancing motherhood, work, and night school in pursuit of her four-year degree. Even now, she continues to watch her friend flourish after years of sacrifice and determination.
Learning more about her background, it became clear that Riddle faced significant struggles while navigating both motherhood and newlywed life. Her first pregnancy came as a surprise at a time when she and her husband were not yet in the financially stable position, she had hoped for before bringing a child into the world.
Despite the challenges, Riddle worked hard to support her growing family during a time when many of the resources available to parents today did not yet exist. Without the internet or social media, finding work and building connections relied heavily on face-to-face interactions and personal relationships.
“Now a woman can make a living solely on social media,” Riddle said. “She really can make a good living doing it.”
This is mentioned while comparing the accessibility and opportunities available today to those that existed when she first became a mother. While the rise of social media has opened new doors and created financial opportunities for many women, Riddle also acknowledged the negative effects that often accompany it. Benefits such as increased accessibility and financial independence are frequently paired with issues like body dissatisfaction, self-comparison, and growing pressure to maintain unrealistic standards online.
Riddle also discussed the pressure many modern mothers face after pregnancy due to the constant exposure to idealized images online. Experts have found that heavy social media use is strongly associated with body dissatisfaction, self-comparison, and symptoms of body dysmorphia, particularly among women and young adults. Research published in Frontiers in Psychology found that image-based social media platforms can significantly increase body image disturbances and appearance-related anxiety among users.
Riddle believes these challenges have become major factors influencing how many women view motherhood today, with some choosing to delay or reconsider having children altogether.
I also spoke with Riddle’s oldest daughter, Maggie Hall, who belongs to a generation of women that grew up alongside social media and are now navigating adulthood, marriage, and motherhood in a much different environment than their parents experienced. Hall has a child of her own and has watched both herself and her friends experience pregnancy in the digital age.
The contrast between Hall’s experience and her mother’s highlights how dramatic motherhood has changed across generations.
“I felt comfort in the fact that I could look up various ways to grow the healthiest child possible through the use of the internet,” Hall said while reflecting on the support and information social media and online resources provided throughout her pregnancy and postpartum experience. While Hall acknowledged the positive aspects of the internet and social media during pregnancy, she also recognized the pressures that often come with constant online exposure.
Platforms such as TikTok have created opportunities for women to financially benefit from content creation and online influence. However, these same platforms can also contribute to unrealistic beauty standards and increased pressure surrounding appearance, particularly for young mothers navigating postpartum life in a highly visual online culture. Riddle also pointed to the growing influence of appearance-based online platforms in modern culture. Subscription-based content platforms such as OnlyFans have allowed some women to earn income through image-centered content and online engagement.
While these platforms have created financial opportunities, critics and mental health experts have raised concerns about the pressure they may place on women to maintain certain physical standards. Riddle believes this growing emphasis on appearance can contribute to anxiety surrounding pregnancy and postpartum bodily changes, particularly among younger women who spend significant time online. There are growing signs that the increasing influence of the internet and social media has contributed to shifting attitudes surrounding traditional expectations of early marriage and motherhood. Riddle believes many women now face added pressure tied not only to financial stability and career success, but also to maintaining certain physical appearances online.
Riddle explained that concerns about postpartum appearance were far less prominent when she was younger because social media did not yet dominate everyday life. She said people were rarely taking photos or constantly exposing themselves to comparisons with others online, creating a much different experience for mothers during pregnancy and postpartum recovery.
She recalled that news traveled far differently at the time, with personal milestones remaining much more private than they often are today.
“People I went to high school with probably didn’t even know I was pregnant unless they ran into me at the grocery store or heard it through friends and family,” Riddle said. According to Riddle, modern mothers are now placed under far greater public visibility through social media, where pregnancies, parenting journeys, and postpartum recovery are often shared online for large audiences to see and judge.
She noted that social media has created a stigma surrounding postpartum bodies, with many women feeling pressured to quickly regain their pre-pregnancy appearance after giving birth. Women are constantly exposed to images and videos of mothers online showcasing how quickly they “bounced back” physically or how effortlessly they appeared to handle postpartum life.
According to Riddle, this can place unnecessary pressure on mothers who are already balancing the emotional, physical, and financial demands that come with raising children. Despite the many changes modern women face, Riddle believes the emotional responsibility of motherhood has remained constant across generations. While social media, financial pressures, and public expectations may look different today than they did decades ago, she says the core challenges of raising children have always required sacrifice, resilience, and unconditional love.
Through conversations with both Riddle and her daughter, Maggie Hall, it becomes clear that motherhood has evolved alongside society itself. Earlier generations faced limited resources and financial instability, while younger mothers now navigate constant online visibility, unrealistic beauty standards, and the pressures created by social media culture.
Still, both women shared a similar belief: no amount of technology or outside influence can fully prepare someone for the realities of becoming a parent.